“…to move toward healing and return to joy requires that we press this one idea deeply into our souls until it begins to impact us at the level of our feelings:
‘I can trust God with this.'” — nancy guthrie

I came across this article last week, and this refrain struck a chord in my heart : I can trust God with this. Trust has been a topic on my mind lately, as we mark the passing of painful anniversaries and prepare to celebrate our wedding anniversary tomorrow. We have seen our share of sorrow, James and I. Come face to face with our crippling inability to control circumstances. Watched loved ones leave faith held dear. Hearts grow cold and distant. Spouses walk out. Family break apart. Cancer steal precious life. Financial stability crumble. And in the face of that loss, had the choice to grow hard and grasp. Clenched fists to keep anything else from slipping away. Or to open. To accept. To press that one idea deep down to the depth of our aching souls. That I can trust God with this.

I’m learning it is one or the other. There’s no half-hearted resignation to suffering. No ‘just scraping by’ in the raw landscape of grief. Closed or Open. Grasping or Resting. I wish I could say I live in the latter. That God has taken care of me so well, now I never doubt Him. But honestly, it’s a daily battle I’m fighting to believe. Trust is not a one and done. That’s how God designed it to remind us of our need.

Maybe you find yourself stuck in the wrestle currently. I don’t know what sorrows and burdens you’re bearing, but please know I’m praying for you today. James reminds me often : He is worth trusting. When I was a newly single mom of five living in my parent’s basement, in the thick of the darkness, I fought to believe it. And I believe it still. Not because of what He has done for me since then (amazing as that story is.) But because of who He is. Whether He gives or takes away. He is always working. Even in the darkest of times. Especially then. Ten thousand things we cannot even see. Let’s keep pressing on to trust Him together.

“Trust Him at all times, O people. Pour out your hearts to Him, for God is our refuge.” Ps. 62:8